Chapter 15. A Fishing Trip
I had to leave the sanctuary of Anna’s
studio to pick up my VA check at the Virgin. Spiderman was at the desk holding
up a foldout to the light. I slammed the counter’s ringer. He damned near fell
out of his chair.
Recovering his composure, he said, “I
see you Crash, but I’d rather look at this. What do you think, is she a ten?”
I glanced at it a second. The light
from the desk lamp reflected off the sheen of the ceramic glaze on the page. I
squinted, pretending to appraise the picture’s most important anatomical
features.
I asked, “You got my check yet?”
He took his gaze off his skin mag to
eye me, “Say, you been takin’ vitamins or something?”
“I didn’t come here for a date,
sweetheart, I just want my check.”
He put the magazine aside, pulled the government
envelope out of my old pigeonhole, and slipped it across the counter, “You
ain’t drinkin’ are you?”
“It’s only been a week. You think it
shows?”
“Yeah, it does.”
“I just have to keep my head clear for
a while. At least ‘til a few things get straightened out. Say, I can pay half
my bill when I cash this.”
“Forget about it until you’re back in
the hack.” Lucas leaned over the counter to damned near whisper, “Crash, I
gotta tell you. Some kind of detective was here, an’ he was lookin’ for you.
What kinda shit’d you get yourself into?”
I couldn’t be too careful, or I’d end
up like Perry, “Was he alone?”
“Yeh, why? What difference does that
make?”
It had to be Ryan because, when it’s
official business, detectives come with back-up. “Not sure, what did he say?”
“He just asked if you were stayin’ with
that Anna chick. I said I didn’t know but you’re a lucky man, Kraszhinski, if
you are.”
“Hey, you’re starting to drool.” I
stepped back to walk away. “But thanks, Spiderman. You don’t have to tell him I
was here.” The thought came to me that Ryan didn’t know where I was hiding out.
Anna hadn’t let him know. I supposed she had good reason not to.
---- break ----
I went out to the corner liquor store
to cash my check. John had been doing that since I first moved into the Virgin.
It was better than direct deposit. I didn’t want a bank account and I liked it
that way. It kept me invisible; no debit cards, credit cards, everything was
cash and carry. I always paid up on the first of the month. I had John stop my
tab at fifty bucks so that I wouldn’t use up my reserves. That was how I
budgeted my VA check.
John cashed my check… counted it out
and passed it to me. I peeled off fifty bucks
“No Crash. You can get me later… when
you’re back on your feet.”
I looked down at my shoes, “Look, I’m
on my feet John. Here, take this. I’m okay, really.”
John took the money, “You know; that
cop friend of yours? Detective Ryan. He was here first thing this morning…
banged on my door before I opened. He says it’s urgent.”
“I know. I’d appreciate it if you don’t
know anything… right.” I clacked three quarters on the counter, and he passed
back a pack of generic smokes.
Sliding a pint across the counter, he
said, “I can’t lie to a cop, Crash,
that ain’t my style.”
I pushed the pint back to him, “You’re
an honest man, John. You don’t have to lie for me.”
----
break ----
I was at the State Street traffic
lights on 101 before I realized that I didn’t take that pint from John. It felt
good. The walk-light changed and two steps into it I had a vague urge to turn
around and go get it. I didn’t have to struggle much though. It felt like a big
hand was on my shoulder guiding me away. It wasn’t long before I was on the
breakwater enjoying the surge of the surf pounding away under me. I sat on the
concrete bench to take in the morning sun. I knew what the big hand was, and
the feeling was vivid… like the way I felt helpless while watching Anna as an
adolescent in my cab… how as a young adult she was in this oh-so-fucked-up
world fighting. Anna wouldn’t be beaten by the perversity of adults; she wouldn’t
be beaten by the arbitrary capriciousness of nature either. It was a feeling of
awe, fear, and beauty, compounded by a willingness to fight for it and against
it. There was no consideration whatsoever of what it would mean to fight it.
That’s when I saw Ryan coming towards me from the Yacht Club.
Ryan stood before me with stout legs
planted apart, hammer fists at his waist, day old speckled with grey carrot
colored stubble on ruddy cheeks below piercing blue eyes. A wool watch-cap
covered a bristled butch-cut on a neckless block of a head that was welded on
broad shoulders above a barrel chest under a Navy-blue cable-knit sweater. He
had ten years on me and was a head shorter, but I wouldn’t take him on. Hell,
I’d rather stand naked without a cape in a bull ring against el Toro than go
toe-to-toe with that man.
I patted my hand on the wet spot where
the spraying surf from the night before left a puddle, “Don’t sit here unless
you want to get your butt wet.”
“Walk with me to Mzz Sherlock, Crash.
You in the mood for some fishing?”
“Depends on what we’re fishin’ for, my
friend.”
“I’m not asking.”
Mzz Sherlock was a clean boat of
about forty-five feet… nothing fancy about her… a modified Main Lobster Yacht.
Called a yacht because it was no longer a working boat but converted for use as
a pleasure craft… a sport fishing boat. The stern had been closed off and
rigged to mount poles so that she would no longer be hauling lobster traps
aboard. The old straight-eight marine engine that powered her could plow
through just about any seas. The cabin was large enough to tuck a gateleg table
that dropped down for a third berth, and on the other side, a chart table for
plotting a course. The most modern features in the cabin were a marine radio, a
scanner and a 1950’s radar screen. Otherwise,
a compass, sextant, and clock, were good enough for him. Forward of, and two
steps below the cabin, it featured a shower next to the head, and in the
forward hold, two more berths.
We boarded and cruised out of the
harbor. I knew he was going to fish for something other than marlin and that he
would be patient. The sea-air away from the harbor was different… just as fresh
and all… but there was something about it.
We baited our lines, set up our poles,
and took turns at the helm. Ryan opened a cooler and pulled out two cans… a
beer for himself and offered me one.
“You got a soda or something?”
“I heard you quit drinking.”
“No. Just laying off a bit. Who told
you that?”
“A little sparrow… ‘sides, you don’t
look so shitty,” he laughed a deep roar. I wondered whether I’d ever heard Ryan
laugh.
I’d damned near forgotten how to drink
a soda. I gulped it down as though it was a beer and tossed the can off the
stern. It was a funny thing, but I was embarrassed enough to think I needed to
make an excuse for my abstinence. I said, “I didn’t really quit. I’m just
putting some time between drinks, if you know what I mean.”
Ryan pushed an empty five-gallon paint
bucket next to me and scowled, “Put ‘em in here next time.”
He cut the motor and we just drifted
with the current. He continued to look at me with a scrunched rusty brow.
A weight pressed my chest and caught in
my craw, so I let it out, “Anna’s in trouble.”
“I know,” he dropped his empty in the
bucket as his line went taut and his pole bent some. He yanked the pole from
its rod holder and hollered, “It’s fishin’ ya know.”
The pole went back to its previous arc,
“You got nothing there, pal.”
“Sometimes the little ones fight harder
than the big ones. You don’t know what you’ve got until you pull it in,” he
said.
I wasn’t comfortable between these two
loyalties. I pounded a cigarette out of the pack but didn’t light it. Anna
hadn’t told me enough to know how much Ryan knew or how much I should let him
know, “And, like I said, you got nothing.”
Ryan was staring at my cigarette,
“Fortuitous subject though… let’s talk about that.”
“Let me guess, it’s not this smoke?
It’s about Anna.”
“You tell me. Anna’s too smart to get
big headed. She’s in a trap she got into as a small fry and now the ante has
been upped on her.”
Ryan’s eyes were still on my smoke,
“Your boss is into some pretty sick shit. Worse than that, he took that bimbo
with him and now it’s starting to cave in on all of them.”
“Yes, there’s Jenny, but I’m not sure
who else you mean.”
“I mean Perry. Bloody murder and more.”
“Anna told me. You do know I was in
jail at the time…?”
“You probably don’t know what’s been
going on. I don’t think you even cared until a week ago. Am I right?”
“That I care? Yeah, I suppose I do.
Ryan, I think I’m coming alive. I feel it and I’m remembering things. I just
didn’t give a shit.” I patted my shirt pocket. Assured that I had a full pack,
I took the helm.
“And now you do?”
“Yeah,
oh I don’t know. I had a child… a daughter. It just keeps getting scrambled.”
I began cruising just fast enough to
create a froth. I watched the foam churning up the ocean astern and, out of a
strange compulsion, I tossed the new pack of smokes over Ryan’s head into the
roiling wake. I don’t know why I did it, but it felt right. It was letting go
of another big chunk of the past.
I looked back in time to see Ryan smile
and a Marlin clear the water. It came back down, missing the bait on my line.
It was a majestic loop and a good sign the day would be a good one. I shouted
over the throbbing motors, “So, Anna’s the live bait? Why are we fishing if you
already have a bead on Doc?”
Ryan reeled the squid towards the boat
in front of how far astern we saw the jumper and, as an aside, he shouted, “You
know, great whites have some sort of instinct. A marine biologist in Monterey
told me. If you kill one… well, the old ones… the big ones… they skedaddle and
don’t come back for a long-assed time. Maybe they discuss us. All you’ve got to
do is kill one. Folks don’t know that.”
I knew lots about great whites and he
knew that the breeding grounds at the Farallons were within my bailiwick. I
hated it when Ryan went into one of his teaching modes and tried to trick me,
“You’re gonna tell me that your fucking marine biologist was Ed Rickets?”
He laughed, “You caught me. Forgot you
college boys read Steinbeck. Okay. I lied, it’s an old fisherman’s story.”
I knew that there had to be more, and
he was stalling to see how patient I could be. There’s a marlin out there and
Ryan’s talking shit about great whites. “You aren’t going to let me know more?”
“About fishing? Crash, you’ll know more
when I know more. Try to remember, this crap will take time and patience. Stay
close to Anna, she has her secrets and I don’t completely trust her, but I know
she can help us out. We don’t want to scare off the big ones. Her story has
some holes in it. Her heart’s good but she’s a compulsive liar and is covering
her sweet ass… for good reason,” he said.
“Okay, I get it now old man. Are you in
love?” If there was a truth I knew up to this point, it was that I hadn’t been
paying attention before the other day. “She’s kinda young for you. I take it
that you’re not going by the book this time?”
“I am. But the book we’re going by
hasn’t been written. Circumstances always warrant an exception. I have to tell
you, something smells bad at the station. Might go up near the top of the chain
of command in the DA’s office and beyond. Someone’s stepped on my earliest
attempts to investigate and I can’t pin it on interdepartmental shenanigans.”
“So, Ryan,” I was intrigued now, Ryan
was going rogue. That wasn’t his style, but I’ve seen him do it before. We both
did back in Nam when command obstructed. Our loyalties were to the boots on the
ground and not the honchoes in the Pentagon.
I probed, “I need to know what we’re
getting into.” Still not sure what anything he said was about, I added, “I’ve
never liked working with the Embassy back then either. Too much like catch and
release.”
Ryan’s rod dipped a couple of times,
“Sometimes they tease the crap out of ya.”
I cut the engines as soon as I heard
the reel’s shrill r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r’s. He grabbed the pole out of its holder and
planted the butt of the rod under his belly. The fight was on. I could see why
Hemingway loved fishing for the big ones. It could be compared to a bare-fisted
boxing match. The rounds keep going until one of the boxers is knocked out… No
TKO’s… Knocked out! And it looked like I had a ringside seat for this bout. The
line went straight down, pole bent… keeping the line taught, Ryan reeled and
released it… brought it closer and let it go out forever further and reeled it
back. The damned thing took a dive down to at least 150 feet. The line changed
directions a dozen times before the fish breached in a graceful leap coming
back down as sure as a fencer’s parry and lunge. Ryan and that leviathan had
been at it at least an hour as I stood by with the gaff. Several
times that fish got almost close enough to gaff but wasn’t tired enough to give
up.
It
dove further, I shouted, “How deep is it here?”
“About
130 fathoms!”
“Shit,
you got that much line, that’s damned near 800 feet!”
“780
to be exact… and no, I’ll have to horse him a bit!”
I was ecstatic even though I’d been at
ready for so long. “What do you figure, six hundred pounds?”
Ryan was calm… his eyes towards the
horizon, “Maybe more. But look, there’s a great white’s fin… just disappeared
out there.”
Another half hour the Marlin had been
tiring but found the reserves to turn away as though fleeing. It mustered
enough strength to make one more leap when, in mid-air, it happened. That
fucking great white breached and sailed in a perfect trajectory to grasp the
fish in its teeth at midsection and dove back down into the deep.
“You see that! Fucking robbed us!” I
cursed, holding the gaff at-ease, no longer ready to haul in our prize.
Ryan pulled up his line with only the
head of that huge Marlin on it. That was all there was left of it. I swear he
was off the charts giddy, “Yeah, but didn’t that give you a rush better than
any of your damned drugs?”
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